Ok here goes.
A new year, what do I want? What are my goals?
ONE
Projects... I want to be proud of anything I do, If it's not my best it's not worth doing.
I'm bothered when I rush something and then regret that it may have been lacking. No more. I don't care to take on a bunch of new hobbies this year I just want to get better at the things I do currently and be proud of what I put out there.
TWO
Where did "Camie" go. It sounds weird to even say my own name. Who's she?
I used to be so sure of who I was, knew what I wanted and how to get it.
Now Im not so sure. I want to be sure.
THREE
Say Yes....
Through this time of being pregnant and this constant feeling of nausea, fatigue, sleeplessness I've entered a world of "Hermit-dom". I've rationalized that if I stay home I can control my environment enough to avoid smells, sights and tasks that make me miserable. Hence, I have been saying NO a lot and have NOT been really "living" for the past 20 weeks. Now it is fading and I am starting to actually feel better, Yay! So it's time to start being a YES person. YES I can do that. YES I can help you. YES I can go there. YES I want that. YES I can handle this.
FOUR
Smile :) Get excited! I perceive myself as a person who has an amazing life and an extremely happy life! Problem is I really struggle expressing that. Willie and I were watching "The Price is Right", I was in awe how excited all these contestants get and how that would never be what I would look like up there. I would be jumping for joy inside but I really doubt my expressions would reflect my feelings. I got a 1965 shiny, red VW beetle completely redone for my 16th birthday. You would think when presented with that I would be acting like a price is right contestant... that's how I felt. No, just some smiles and thank you's. My poor dad...he worked on it for months! Now 27, It's still a struggle! I am drawn to people who's, laugh and smile and countenance are smiley, happy, infectious.... that's how I feel inside. Why can't I express it? Now I want it to show outside as well.
FIVE
Service. I'm craving that feeling, that high from giving yourself for something good. What I'm not sure yet, but when the opportunity arises I want to have the attitude and mindset to be ready to take it on.
I'll stop at 5. I could have an entire goal designated to following through with other goals!
This should keep me busy for the year. That and 3 boys come May all under one roof!
